I am incredibly emotionally worked up today, as I have been for the past week or so.
I'm not even gonna bother typing properly coz' I'm just so tired. 4.32am here. I guess I only have myself to blame for staying up this late. Again.
Have you ever noticed that your thoughts just start to run wild the later you stay up? It's as if the part of your brain that keeps you sane and in check just decided to call it a night and let your retarded, over-thinking side dominate. And for the past few nights, I have been bombarded with thoughts of how the people around me have hurt me in the past. It's strange how I remember certain events that still affect me till today, even though some of them happened way back when. All those hurtful words that were meant as jokes suddenly don't seem that funny to me anymore. I've never been upfront about the things that hurt me, and so most (if not, all) of the people I know don't really know that I'm still quite sensitive to certain topics. I guess there's a downside to keeping a straight face all the time, even when I feel like they've gone too far. On most days, I can usually take in a lot of teasing and would probably throw it back at them twice as hard if I could, simply because I've learned not to take things so seriously.
But on days like this, I don't know why but I just can't help but feel a little taken for granted.
I don't know. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I've destroyed my brain cells staying up all night and have now been reduced to an unstable stick-like creature with dark circles that sweep the floor.
Sorry if all of this doesn't make any sense. Don't really have the energy to proof read. Don't really care to anyway.
